I realize it's been a long time since I've written...and here's why. A good friend of mine, Jen, had a stroke the day after I got home from Fitness Ridge and was life flighted to Salt Lake. She has been in the hospital there ever since. She has a rare blood disease and fell into Locked In Syndrome. She died on Monday morning. I'm really struggling with losing her.
I've had a lot of emotional issues for the past 6 months to a year and she was the person I talked to every single time I felt depressed. I've never known anyone who understood quite like her. And since I've been feeling very depressed about losing her, I needed her more than ever.
Jen's husband, Darren, is an incredibly strong, brave man and he has peace based on his faith that Jen is in heaven. I believe she is too and that helps but I selfishly want her to be here now.
The last communication I had with Jen was her post on my blog, I think on the 3rd day I was in Fitness Ridge. This is the last thing she ever said to me:
"I'm so proud of you and all you've accomplished so far...you are AmAzINg!! Just remember all of us back home are rooting for your success! You are an inspiration to me :)
Love you! Jen"
She was amazing and supportive and I miss her so so much.
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Wonder Woman
I've been home from Fitness Ridge for a little over a week now. The transition back to regular life was actually pretty hard on me. It's amazing to me how quickly I became comfortable with life at Fitness Ridge. I still miss it. I miss the resort, the people and the way my life was there. I was so nervous to be home. I just kept feeling like I was going to fall back into my old patterns. I came home to a very busy week. I had to go out to dinner for events with my friends twice and had a house party to go to on Saturday.
I actually did really well. The two nights I went out to dinner I looked up the restaurants online before I went to make sure I would have healthy options. I planned what to eat and stuck with the plan when I got there. I was most worried about the house party on Saturday night. These are the friends that I usually drink with and I was worried about how I would handle that. The party was at my friend, Sera's house. She called me ahead of time and asked how many calories I can have in a day. It turns out most of those friends are trying to get healthier too so the food would be healthy. Chris and I found the recipe for a 90 calorie margarita and I was pretty excited that I'd actually be able to have a drink.
The party was a lot of fun for me. I got to have a margarita, we ate kabobs off the grill that were wonderful and I even made Fitness Ridge's chocolate covered strawberries for dessert. I saved enough calories for the margarita and that was nice. My friends were incredibly supportive and had questions about my trip. I was very pleasantly surprised by how supported and happy I felt.
The next day I went hiking with my friend Tera and her little boy and our dogs. It feels so good to be able to do things like that with friends. Before Fitness Ridge I'd have been too embarrassed to go hiking with Tera because she's in great shape and I'd have thought I would hold her back. We also talked about the experience and I told her about some of the emotional issues that I believe led to my weight gain. It was a little scary to open up about some of those things but also a relief to get it off my chest.
On Friday night Chris and I went to my parents' house. I hadn't seen my Mom since I'd gotten home and I loved telling her about the experience. We had dinner there and breakfast in the morning. I wasn't worried about eating there because my parents' eat healthy food anyway, and this was no exception. In the morning Chris, Dad and I went on a 3-4 mile walk with my dog and my parents' little Shih Tzu Archie.
Over all, I am surprised to find that eating well has been the easiest thing to do at home. Exercise takes more work to keep up with. My husband is amazing support with that as he has started pushing me and holding me accountable. I am grateful for that change in our relationship. We have always enabled each other to be lazy and eat badly and now we're changing that pattern.
Since I've been home Chris has lost 12 pounds by eating well and exercising. I've lost 7 pounds since I've been home, bringing my total so far to 22.
A couple of pretty big things have happened since I've been home. My friend, Jen, had a stroke on Monday night (a week ago) and was rushed via life flight to Salt Lake. She is still in intensive care and on a ventilator. We are very lucky that she's still with us and still fighting. Please pray for my friend.
On Tuesday I gave my two weeks notice to the job I've had for 3 1/2 years. My last day will be this Friday. It's been very sad for me to say goodbye to the kids but I know I'm making the right decision.
When one of the kids I work with first saw me last week he said "Oh! Short hair!" about 10 times. He likes long hair and I think he was bothered that I cut off so much. Then he said "Skinny!" I was thrilled. These kids don't know how to lie and they never say things just to flatter you. He really noticed I lost weight. It was great!
Lastly, my amazing friend Malynda has been just one of the sweetest people in the world to me. When she saw me she immediately said that I looked a lot smaller and every time she sees me she says she can't get over how different I look. She calls me Wonder Woman and posted this picture to my Facebook.
If that's Wonder Woman, I can live with that. I still have some work to do.
I actually did really well. The two nights I went out to dinner I looked up the restaurants online before I went to make sure I would have healthy options. I planned what to eat and stuck with the plan when I got there. I was most worried about the house party on Saturday night. These are the friends that I usually drink with and I was worried about how I would handle that. The party was at my friend, Sera's house. She called me ahead of time and asked how many calories I can have in a day. It turns out most of those friends are trying to get healthier too so the food would be healthy. Chris and I found the recipe for a 90 calorie margarita and I was pretty excited that I'd actually be able to have a drink.
The party was a lot of fun for me. I got to have a margarita, we ate kabobs off the grill that were wonderful and I even made Fitness Ridge's chocolate covered strawberries for dessert. I saved enough calories for the margarita and that was nice. My friends were incredibly supportive and had questions about my trip. I was very pleasantly surprised by how supported and happy I felt.
The next day I went hiking with my friend Tera and her little boy and our dogs. It feels so good to be able to do things like that with friends. Before Fitness Ridge I'd have been too embarrassed to go hiking with Tera because she's in great shape and I'd have thought I would hold her back. We also talked about the experience and I told her about some of the emotional issues that I believe led to my weight gain. It was a little scary to open up about some of those things but also a relief to get it off my chest.
On Friday night Chris and I went to my parents' house. I hadn't seen my Mom since I'd gotten home and I loved telling her about the experience. We had dinner there and breakfast in the morning. I wasn't worried about eating there because my parents' eat healthy food anyway, and this was no exception. In the morning Chris, Dad and I went on a 3-4 mile walk with my dog and my parents' little Shih Tzu Archie.
Over all, I am surprised to find that eating well has been the easiest thing to do at home. Exercise takes more work to keep up with. My husband is amazing support with that as he has started pushing me and holding me accountable. I am grateful for that change in our relationship. We have always enabled each other to be lazy and eat badly and now we're changing that pattern.
Since I've been home Chris has lost 12 pounds by eating well and exercising. I've lost 7 pounds since I've been home, bringing my total so far to 22.
A couple of pretty big things have happened since I've been home. My friend, Jen, had a stroke on Monday night (a week ago) and was rushed via life flight to Salt Lake. She is still in intensive care and on a ventilator. We are very lucky that she's still with us and still fighting. Please pray for my friend.
On Tuesday I gave my two weeks notice to the job I've had for 3 1/2 years. My last day will be this Friday. It's been very sad for me to say goodbye to the kids but I know I'm making the right decision.
When one of the kids I work with first saw me last week he said "Oh! Short hair!" about 10 times. He likes long hair and I think he was bothered that I cut off so much. Then he said "Skinny!" I was thrilled. These kids don't know how to lie and they never say things just to flatter you. He really noticed I lost weight. It was great!
Lastly, my amazing friend Malynda has been just one of the sweetest people in the world to me. When she saw me she immediately said that I looked a lot smaller and every time she sees me she says she can't get over how different I look. She calls me Wonder Woman and posted this picture to my Facebook.
If that's Wonder Woman, I can live with that. I still have some work to do.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)